Do you often feel overwhelmed with everything you have to do as an expat mum?
Let me ask you, do you worry about your kids? Do you find yourself asking, are they doing OK in school? Are they making friends? Are they being challenged enough? Do they have the right teacher?
Sound familiar… When I chat with friends we often end up on this topic. But is it really something we, as parents, can affect? Can we control how our kids are going? Can we change it for them? In the large part, no.
Do you worry about your partner’s assignment? Do you find yourself asking, are we staying? Going? Extending? Again, when I get together with friends, this is often a topic that comes up. Followed by, where might we be going next? Again, can you control it? Can you change it?… No!
So what can you do? With your kids you can ensure you are present at the school, engaging with teachers whenever there is an opportunity. Volunteer if you have the capacity to do so, it’s a great way to learn more about what is going on at school and connect with other parents.
When it comes to your partner and their assignment, you can make sure you prepare healthy and nutritious meals, you can be a sounding board when they need one, you can connect and talk and share your love, but there isn’t actually very much you can physically do for them.
The problem is, if we do spend our time and energy worrying about things that are outside our control we become overwhelmed and stressed. We feel too busy to take care of ourselves, we feel unhappy and when this starts happening we also start snapping at our kids.
If we’re not in a strong position emotionally, it’s often our parenting that suffers.
If you want to be more proactive and in control of your life, you need to shift your focus to those actions that are in your area of control. But let’s face it’s hard! And this is where it is so important to have support from friends, from family, from community. Surround yourself with people like you, find your tribe and support each other.
How do you manage your stress? Please share in the comments, I would love to hear from you!
If you want further support in managing overwhelm and stress, individual coaching may be of interest to you. For more information please click here. Register your interest in any of the coaching packages before 30 April 2019 to receive 20% discount!